Minister of Health Reveals That ‘Doggy’ During S*x Causes Cancer, Stroke

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South Africa’s Minister of Health, Aaron Motsoaledi, has said ‘doggy’ style during s*x is the major cause of cancer and stroke. He said after three years of arduous research, he found out that the high pumping of blood during s*x, when one is standing or kneeling overloads the veins in the legs which ultimately causes stroke.

He told The Insider, “On cancer – one of the main causes of cancer is stress, fatigue and tiredness. The most energy consuming and stressful sexual position for men is doggy; hence the connection is more than clear. Look, I am only giving you guys a snippet, but we will be posting the results of the full research on the Ministry website.” He added that he is in talks with Home Affairs Minister, Malusi Gigaba to craft a legislation that will seek to outlaw this style. According to him, occasional doggy style like only on Christmas day and Valentine is harmless but be sure that each night is suicidal. “This is the reason why South African married men die and leave their wives a lot these days,” the 58-year-old man added.